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Fast Forward

13 Oct

As I read my old posts, it takes me to another place in time. My life today, two years later, looks the same as it did before, on the outside. I live in the same city I left. I am married, and raising kids. A new one, Kai, joined our family in June. He is a miracle. He is the joy that erased the pain.

It’s been 18 months or so since I’ve written a post. I’m not sure where to start. Many of my network still see me in Hawaii. I could start by telling you the story of my return to the mainland from Hawaii on Mother’s Day, 2010… but that is a painful memory. So, I’ll start with a happy story.

Paul and I were married on a Pier by a fisherman who happened to be an Ordained Minister. It was a gift from God, affirming our faith to one another. That day marked the beginning of a family that is supernaturally, natural.

I do not know why my other two children adapted to the “new” so quickly….or why I rarely think of Hawaii.

Perhaps because the joy of a new life brought into the world, or the knowledge of my own life – redeemed.

Witnessing the story of redemption, first hand is an experience that centers me in faith. Faith, the knowledge and understanding, that when all else fails, God is still in charge. It did not matter how far I ran, or where I sought peace. My dad said “follow peace”.

Now I understand that peace is within me, because God is there, too.

Today, my struggles are not a roof over my head – rather they seem so insignificant compared to 2010. The yard needs to be mowed, I want more time with my new baby, how is my husband, and will my 13 year old win her volleyball game today? They pale in comparison to 99% of our world…. but… this IS my world. It is a gift from God, mine to enjoy.

He gives and takes away – and gives back 100 fold. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

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